Meet The Family...DJ

This is DJ. He is my oldest. I am going to post a series of Meet the Family, and he came first, cuz he is first.

Dj is the King of Bored. He has whined he was bored while at a monster truck rally. I am , quite frankly, concerned about this. Sometimes I think he is still going to be living in my basement when he is 35 nagging me about his allowance and bitching about being bored.

On the upside, the boy can cook like nobodies business. He can run 3 miles without being out of breath, and is a mathematical savant. And, he is Beautiful. This was the child, when taken out in public as an infant, would cause people to disregard all the BLUE surrounding him and tell me what a beautiful little girl I had. This enraged his father. Then they would try to touch him, which enraged me. We stopped taking him out. Could that be the reason he IS ALWAYS BORED?

Bored?

Why are they always BORED? In my experience, one is really only bored when they haven't the brain power or creativity to find a way to entertain themselves. These children have more squawk box gadgets, computers and games then I ever imagined possible when I was 16. Yet, that is the most common phrase said in this house. Could this be the reason they are prone to dating clowns? I myself have found numerous ways of entertaining myself at her, and by extension, my sons expense lately. Some involved a big red foam nose, my husbands shoes....COME ON PEOPLE!

THIS is the only living thing in our house with a legit reason for boredom, and that is only because I will not allow her to stay outside in the rain barking at every passing car and making the neighbor shit himself by snarling at him through the fence...And she stinks like, well....wet dog when she comes back in, and befowls the couch with her stench. I really don't care about the neighbors incontinence, as his pigeon shits on my car EVERY TIME I WASH IT.

MEET ZENA, QUEEN OF THE HORSE/DOGS!!